I have found the answer to the world’s oldest question.
WHY DID…
THE CHICKEN…
CROSS…
THE ROAD?
To run over and steal all the wonderful worms from my gardens as I work!
Hiding behind the garlic grasses will not save you from my wrath bird!
I swear if you girls were not laying 6+ eggs a day you would be freezer meat! (I still have about a dozen other birds you know?!? And they are staying OUT of my gardens!)
I’ve been a planting fool over the last four weeks!
• Corn with cucs.
• Tomatoes with marigolds.
• Hot peppers in one spot.
• Sweet peppers in a spot far away from the hot ones.
• Extra beets, carrots, and dill EVERYWHERE.
Then, just when I thought it was safe to bring out the big guns (pumpkins, squashes, melons) this happens:
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DAY DESCRIPTION HIGH/LOW PRECIP WIND HUMIDITY
WED
MAY 17 PM Thunderstorms 71°43° 40% N 13 mph 48%
THU
MAY 18 Rain/Wind 45°35° 100% NE 21 mph 90%
FRI
MAY 19 Rain/Snow 48°31° 100% N 14 mph 79%
Rain and snow in the morning. The rain and snow will become lighter and change to all rain in the afternoon. High 48F. Winds N at 10 to 20 mph. Chance of rain 100%.
************************************************************************************
REALLY?? We are at mid-May, and NOW it decides to snow – Mother Nature I really need to have a heart-to-heart talk with you!!
I just finished putting out all the tomatoes and peppers (heat lovers of course – grrr) and was getting ready to get out the big viners. It’s a good thing I took an afternoon off to relax my back (yep – another wonderful thing about being elderly – eek – older – double eek- experienced – OK, I like that one…being more experienced!) before hitting it all again.
I feel lucky that with age does come a bit of wisdom (ok, maybe just a lot of luck!) and I prepped covers for everything outside as I placed them in the plots. Alright, alright…I actually was not thinking about bad weather but my renegade chickens. No matter how much I fence or feed them in their pen, the beasties still get out and prefer to dig up whatever I put in the ground. Maybe I need to stress more that I have part of a freezer empty and they would fit in there nicely?
≡ 
Oh well, maybe they knew something I was not even thinking about – getting this cold this late in the season. Maybe Ole’ Mom Nature gave them a hint to force me to put fenced hoops over everybody? Maybe it was her way of telling me that this mess was heading my way – naaa, just sounds good doesn’t it?
So, now that I have done all the first round hard stuff (cleaning, prepping and planting) I need to get ready for the second round hard stuff.
I now have to:
1. bring out all the plastic,
2. measure,
3. cut,
4. secure
5. and pray.
Yep, pray that the wind does not rip off all the covers and ruin all my hard work.
Some weeks are just more of a challenge than others I guess!?!
I was wondering around the trees and bushes to the south yesterday. I needed to see if I should water anyone just in case the storm scheduled to today (it came) missed us again. I was not paying attention to where I was walking because I was checking the base of the plants when “OUCH” – SOMETHING STABBED ME! Not a poke but a nasty stab. This was the culprit:
I purposely left this picture larger than most, just to try to impress upon you the length and effectiveness of our locust tree spikes (the minimum length of these spiky behemoths is three inches). Yep, this monster has gotten very dangerous indeed!
If I ever run out of yarn, sewing, or darning needles; these suckers would be perfect! They are as strong as steel, sharper than a knife, and more vicious than a guard dog.
Somehow in the next few days, I need to figure out how to get near it to do some trimming. Pretty sure I will at least need body armor. We used to have a long-handled hand saw to do things like this, but my grandson decided to try jousting with it – and lost.
One of my grand delusions is to have a huge four-foot-thick castle wall around our property (because too many people find us to be the Colorado Information/Gas Station/Potty Stop Center). Now I think I will try to grab some suckers off this beastie and try to root start them. Wonder if a huge hedge of them, totally surrounding our property, would keep the uninvited out? Hmm, something fun to ponder this Friday!
(Hee, hee – next best thing to Aubrey 2 – LOL)
The ugly storms that came through Colorado decided to dump moisture almost everywhere but here – boo hoo! With the temps jumping back into the 70’s tomorrow, my hose team (which is just me dragging out a bazillion hose’s) is set up and ready to go. Now I am thinking about what to share with you over this next month.
(When you realize your hose is old-)
My thoughts, topics, and ideas usually get inspiration from all the different emails regarding farming and gardening. Most are just shares, some are things to buy, and some are of a more serious nature. Those of you that have been following me know how I do not care much for the serious. I get too serious and have a bad tendency to get on my soapbox and rant. That is the biggest reason I shy away from them – however – that being said:
I want to share that I support this organization (not financially because I am broke, but I do sign petitions and emails to the Government):
http://www.centerforfoodsafety.org/about-us
The reason why I connect with them instead of worrying about the FDA is simple – – – ACTION! They are working hard to try to assure us that our food sources are decent and safe to eat. I live for this way of life.
Yes, we do have to buy some things from the markets. Yes, I do read labels. Yes, it does make a difference to me what I feed myself and my family. This, and more, is the reason why I follow these guys. With all the ugly recent changes in our county of late, I am pushing more to maintain our own family food mill.
I know I have several readers from other countries and I am curious to know how you best obtain your foods? Markets? Open Markets? Barter? Or are you a self-supplier? Please share as I will probably never get to go world traveling (boo hoo), I find it all interesting! I also think there is something great to be gained with universal exchange of knowledge, especially in regard to good, clean food.
Then, on occasion, I see headlines from ezines like this:
Brazil, Mexico make first deposits to ‘doomsday’ data vault.
Which reinforces why I love to grow our own food. They are saving seeds in a far-off hide away prepping for the end of everything. Hmm?? I always wondered if there are people there to take care of things should it happen – AND – do they know how to farm or at least garden? I mean really, if they save all the great seeds but no one knows what to do with them, what does it matter? Oh, and don’t get me started on the hybrid/GMO seeds that are sterile.
So, for me there is a great sense of satisfaction when you get to eat the fruits of your own labors. That is just one benefit of growing your own. Some of the others are:
We grow our own peppers, but still to get our black pepper from the store. We grow stevia for added sweetener, but we still get our sugar in bulk from the local beet factory (or store if needed). On a side note, our small town local grocery stories
are outstanding! I have requested some special items several times, and they went out of their way to provide it. They also helped us during the fire and for that they will be eternally our friends! You tell me if you can get one of the big mass grocery stores to do that?
We love to do bartering, trading, sharing in tons of different ways. I think that may also come from farm, or at least small town, living. I hope that you have connections – near or far – that you can exchange seeds, food, or just ideas with. If I missed something here, please share!
Today day is going to be fun Friday! I have decided that things in the world (in general) have been way too serious and it is bumming me out – big time! So, I have decided that one day a week – Friday – I am going to delegate my writing to something off-the-wall, fun, funny, or just all around cute. (Not like my writing isn’t already semi-silly, but I want to push it a bit farther.)
This may be about things on the farm, or it may be related to something I saw or read. Today is something I read via my email newsletter from them:
Newborn mountain lion is the poster kitten for wildlife corridors by MNN
(Photo by National Park Service)
Now how can anyone resist that face? The story that goes with it is also wonderful! I strongly urge you to read it and, if so inclined, sign up for their new letter. It a wonderful read about all kinds of earth-related items. Since this is Earth Day Month – perfect time to do so!
On a more silly note,
Apparently, this is my secretary/assistant today? I have knocked it off my desk several times, but it keeps popping up on something. Maybe it just is trying to get me to throw it outside? There are a number of wild birds perched in the tree outside the door. Pretty sure they would love it if I did!
Then there are these freakazoids:
Apparently, they do not know IT’S APRIL! Bloomin fools, with fool being the operative word here.
This extra little fun kicker just happened over the last couple weeks:
I remember when my brother-in-law bought this beautiful old caddy (can’t remember it’s year – 60’s something), and it immediately went into their garage. That was decades ago, and it was in there or storage ever since. He had always wanted to fix it up – but life goes on as it does. Now he has passed it down to his son and grandson, and the two are having a blast rebuilding it! Can’t wait to see this beauty in action when they are done.
Finally, for this fun Friday, I would be amiss if I did not do something for the farmer in me. So I will leave you now with this beautiful thought that someone shared with me:
There are times in life that you just cannot take anymore! One of my mother’s favorite expressions was “God never gives you anymore than you can handle.” WHAT A CROCK!
Three years of the worst drought Colorado had seen in more than 100 years. That was our first 3 years on the farm.
A goat herd going from 75 down to 42 in one spook by a coyote and dive into a train. Most of what the train took out was the babies – broke my heart the first time.
A new batch of 12-week old chicks just moved from the porch to their own space in the chicken barn. We just knew it was secure – wrong. The mama fox and her kits snuck in from the older chicken side and went on a frenzy. When it was all said, and done, the fox carried off just one older hen, and all but two of the one hundred babies were dead. I opened the door and dropped to the ground when I saw the carnage.
Purchased the greenhouse kit when we moved in, August 2000. Spent over three years arguing with the company over a stupid finally shipping/admin fee. We won the war but lost the battle. The delay cost us our savings for that project and it took till 2011 to finally get to it. As of this post it is still not complete, but it is workable.
Then in 2007 we were in the storm path. The old farmers around here say you can tell how you will do with the first good spring storm. They are right. If you are hit hard on the first, you will be hit by everyone that year, and we were. Our outside gardens – tomatoes, peppers, cucs, everything were in full fruit mode in July. One Saturday storm evening and everything was stripped to a single stalk. This also shredded our roof and window frames. It was not large hail, just the sheer force of it did the damage.
In 2014, we had the fire. April 20, Easter Sunday. It was a beautiful day. By 8pm that night our world was gone! It is very true that you never know what you have till it’s gone. A 4-year old grandson, fifty plus years of memories, pictures, tools, personal art and craft works including several things by our mother, now deceased.
Well it is 2017. AND I HAVE FINALLY HAD ENOUGH!
OH, who am I kidding, they are gonna have to bury me on this place! A person like me does not fight so hard for something to simply give up – not gonna happen!
So, for all of you that maybe fighting your own fights and contemplating quitting – don’t! Here’s a bit of advice from an old expert at it:
HAPPY APRIL FOOLS DAY EVERYONE!!
(No, we are not selling the farm- this is where my littlest pirate watches over us all!)
Did I get you?
Snow, snow go away – rain come out so plants can play!
Got my wish! Our fun state tied a record yesterday (3/23/17), high temp of 76 degrees at the same time as a blizzard watch (starts in our mountains):
We have been watching all the news channels over the last 48 hours in the hope that we would not see freezing or snow, and we did not (at least not in our perfect space)! Colorado is so weird with its weather. I can change from one hour to the next, but it can also give us tons of wonderful rain while 50 miles south and west are getting a blizzard. I have seen it raining across the street and not touch us at all (that was fun!).
The rain is a welcome sight. However, this also means that I need to get my butt in gear on tuning up the mowers (love the rider, hate the push)! Things have been greening up here a tiny bit, but after this bit, we will be bloomin’ fools.
But, with everything going on around us today, couldn’t help but think of the fun movie “Evan Almighty” and the scene that hit me the most today…when the ark crashes into Congress and Steve Carell basically calls John Goodman an idiot for being so underhanded, sneaky, and self-centered.
Hope you are all having a fun Friday and looking forward to spring finally springing!
One of my fav all-around veggies is cabbage. I am half Irish, and this is a must! (Mom would find a way to haunt me about it if I don’t! Her side of the family has always been more fun…a bit off, but more fun!) In honor of St. Patrick’s day, my Farmer’s Almanac newsletter sent me this winner, not like I needed any more reasons to eat cabbage, but they are interesting facts:
13 HEALTHY REASONS TO START EATING MORE CABBAGE!
One of our favorite ways to have it is fried. You can make cabbage pockets:
Which are yummy too, but we prefer just to chop it up, and go with it. Sometimes we will do it with onions (sorry, bad pun!).
We have grown both varieties of green and purple. Even tried growing Bok Choy, but didn’t have the same appeal to us as regular old cabbage.
Since it goes so well with corned beef (we have feasted on a couple of those already), we just can’t help but get going on our annual cabbage frenzy! Those of you that may need a bit-O-help getting their cabbage on, the almanac also gave up a fool-proof recipe, check it out! (F.Y.I., we always crockpot ours at least overnight before slicing. Oh, and always make sure to cut against the grain.)
This year my sister wants to try making our own sauerkraut? This should be interesting since we do not have anything like mom’s old canning crocks (try to find them now – WITHOUT a huge price tag on them) to let it soak in.
If any of you have a good modern recipe, I would love it if you would share!!
So, HAPPY ST. PATRICKS DAY to you all! May it be filled with fun and enjoyment. (It’s our Friday “game night” this year, so you know we will!)
I do not consider myself a very good seamstress. I am very proud of my yarn art, crafting, painting, card making, gardening and many other things, I can even change the tires and oil on my vehicles; but sewing not so much. One of the many reasons maybe that on my very first attempt I ran my finger over (mom could not quit laughing at the threads hanging from the finger when I asked for her help!?). Since half that finger is now gone, no worries – right?
Then there was my first attempt at trying to make a piece of clothing. Three rainy days in Wisconsin. I was in my late teens. I had purchased my first sewing machine, all the tools of the trade, and a great pattern for a jacket like the one Don Johnson (look him up youngsters, yes he was/is an actor) had with the patches on the elbows (from the TV show). It was gonna be great!
Three cold, rainy days I worked away at it. Three soggy, nasty, frigid days I gave to that sucker. Then, on the third day, the angels sang “it is finished” – sort of. I went into the bathroom so I could see how it looked in the mirror. One sleeve was about four inches shorter than the other – IDIOT! HOW DID YOU NOT NOTICE THAT?? That left a scar for many, many years to come.
(Not my jacket but same issue. Just make my bad sleeve about six more inches shorter than the other – boo hoo!!)
I limited my sewing abilities to hand embroidery and hand patching (got pretty good at both), and sewing or mending very simple things. If there was a big project to be done, I passed it off to my mother with a lot of begging – pleeeease!!
The old sewing machine she had, managed to stay with her through all our moves. It was a Singer, but it had these cool knob thingys. You selected the knob by the picture that was on it. Stuffed it into a hole on the machine and then turned it to match the line for your selection and – bam – you were sewing a special stitch! She loved that machine.
(closest pic I could find to hers)
When she passed, it stayed with us – at least until the fire.
When we started rebuilding our lives, I knew one of the major things we were going to need was a new sewing machine. You cannot properly manage a farm without means of patching and mending. So, “NEW” is the operative word here! I had no clue how much the “new” beasties had changed. I knew that vehicles, music and the like had upgraded to digital; but I was blind-sided by how much sewing machines had transitioned that direction too.
They are still the same basic size and shape as the have always been, but the computer programming in these suckers is scary! I had to read the instruction manual (yes, guys – I do that from time-to-time) just to figure out how to make a straight stitch!? I am not a computer dummy by any means, nor am I a proficient geek about them; however, this new one really did scare me!
My sewing was rough at best before; now it was pure torture! I am determined to get a handle on this monster, how soon that will be is anyone’s guess. I managed to make some basic flannel curtains for our smoke room/porch. They turned out really nice (which was great for my seamstress ego)! My thought is to keep it all simple and basic for now. One day I hope to try a new stitch a week, not now mind you. Oh, and this devil has an embroidery feature to it that the only thing I have to do is program the picture and change colors when it stops and tells me to – show off! It can do in hours what it takes me days to do by hand. Not sure I like that?
Sure it’s pretty. Yes, it is fast. But does it put the blood, sweat, and tears – oh and the love – into its work? I think not! Ha Ha machine – gotcha there! (F.Y.I. I got REALLY STUPID and purchased a serger at the same time as the Beastie. Can you say, IDIOT!?)
I get a great newsletter from a group called MNN (Mother Nature Network). It carries a ton of different bits of information. The latest one that caught my eye had something to do with me, or so I thought.
What is microsleep – and did you experience it?
Microsleep – I thought it was going to be information that could tell me why I can’t seem to get more than 4 hours sleep a night – nope!
The article states that a bunch of us (me included) go through micro – sleeps during our day – WHAT??? Apparently, I have been doing this for decades and didn’t even know it had a name. I hate to say it, but I am also guilty of the driving micro – ouch!
The article goes on to tell me that the only cure is to get 7 to 9 hours of sleep per night (yes, I am laughing hysterically right now). Well, that was just a big help wasn’t it – not!
It is nice to know that I am not alone when I do this. It is also nice to know that it can happen to anyone at any time. It would be better to know ways to stop or cure it. Here are my tried-and-true methods for handling this epidemic:
1) THE MICRO IN THE CAR CURES:
Well weary warriors, hope these micro shares help you in your endeavors. A little side note: Should you microsleep when you are gardening – got with it! My suggestion is to simply lay down on the warm ground and take a good nap. If you are really lucky, no one will ever know, and you can wake up refreshed!
HELBERG FARM STORIES 